Date Night

Friday night Bart and I went to Jiffy Lube to get the oil in our vehicles changed. We had no kids with us and no puppies. We sat in the waiting room and just talked about nothing. In comes these two nice looking young men. Around 22. Talking about tanning and a road trip. The four of us were the only ones in the waiting room.
Bart and I were talking about motorcycles and stocks for the most part. We were laughing. It was an easy conversation and we were having fun. I could tell the guys were listening to us talk. Bart had to go out and pay for the vehicles and the dark haired guy started in.
“How long have you been married?”
“13 years.”
“That long?.....So you married really young?”

O.K. now that could be the end of the story. I was instantly in love with the two of them.

However, it goes on. I was proud to say, “I married when I was 24.” A two digit number, excellent. A two digit number that starts with a 2, commendable in Utah. A two digit number that starts with a two and does not end in a prime number, almost impossible at BYU. I, then, added “And that was too young for me.”
The blonde guy says “Well, I am 22 and have no girlfriend.” But the dark haired guy was looking for more. “Too young? Why? Is being married hard?”
“Sure. I mean, it is good too but I would say our first 7 years were the worst.”
“Why? How? Financially? Emotionally?” He pushes further. I could tell they were really wanting to know. I had to think about this. What would I have listened to when I was 22?
“Well, I think that mostly it was the idea that marriage is supposed to be this complete togetherness thing and it isn’t. You still will want and need to maintain your own identity and sometimes that is painful to one or both of you. Also having kids is hard. It was hard for me to stay home with them even though that was totally what I wanted to do.”
“Was it hard financially?”
“Sure, we were poor.”
“Well, isn’t everyone?” And my first thought about that was well, we’re not now but I didn’t say that. I told the truth.
“We were poor but we bought a house and sucked it up. We sold that house and moved into a bigger one. Bart wasn’t doing too well then and we ended up selling that house, paying off our debts, moving into a rental for a year until we got it together and bought another house.”
“Seven years, huh?”
“Well, it was for me. But I am also very hard to live with so maybe it would be different for others.”
They laughed like they were supposed to and told me about their parents and their marriages. That they thought their mom and dad were now happier now that the kids were all out of the house. That it was the blonde guy’s birthday that weekend and they were doing the crazy thing of driving to California for the two days. I hope they drove carefully.
I left feeling like I had just had a review of the last decade of my life and I had passed. I realized that I was proud of the life that Bart and I have created through loving, fighting, laughing, crying, discussing, ignoring and cherishing. I felt close to tears as I held in my hands a tangible feeling of warmth and gratification revolving around me and my family. Pretty good for a cheap Friday night date to Jiffy Lube.